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Dirty Magazines

by Owen's New Best Friends

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1.
VERSE 1 Ever since his mama died Through ladies’ windows Farley spied To punish, Dad said dig a hole And Daddy’s always in control Now his dear old dad is dead Child’s mind still in his head Yet his body’s fully grown And the freak is on the loose all alone CHORUS 1 He's freaky Freaky Farley He doesn't party But there's one thing he'll do He's a freak Freaky Farley He isn’t sorry And Freaky Farley's gonna peep on you VERSE 2 The girl is naked for a swim She invites him to come in Not like others from his past Farley has a friend at last But there are monsters in the trees (monsters in the trees) Worse than Farley’s peeping sprees (peeping peeping) Now she’s dead and he is mad (dead dead dead dead) Time for revenge; it will be bad CHORUS 2 He's freaky Freaky Farley He doesn't party But there's one thing he'll do He's a freak Freaky Farley He isn’t sorry And Freaky Farley's gonna murder you BRIDGE He’s out there in the woods (Freaky Farley Freaky Farley) Better close your curtains tight (Freaky Farley Freaky Farley) Your window’s so inviting (Freaky Farley Freaky Farley) To those watching in the night (Freaky Farley Freaky Farley) CHORUS 1 CHORUS 2
2.
VERSE 1 Pounding out some curls I’m at the gym to be seen Being watched by the girl At the thigh squeezing machine So I strike a pose Without breaking a sweat To make sure she knows What she sees she might get My biceps aquiver My abs make me shiver My pecs pumped up stretching my skin As I look in the mirror It couldn’t be clearer My body’s in it for the win CHOURS 1 I flex for my girlfriend I flex for my wife I flex for all the special women I’ve known through my life Take a look at these glutes You can give them a squeeze ‘Cause I’ve devoted my life To flexing for the ladies VERSE 2 She goes down for a squat Gym shorts tight on her rear She knows that she’s hot Her eyes pull me near She puts on a show I’m enjoying the view But I think we both know She doesn’t look as good as I do I get under the bar To show her how far I can pump iron into ecstasy I check my reflection And gaze at perfection I’m swole as swole can be CHORUS 2 I flex for hot teachers I flex for hot moms I flex for college girls ‘Cause smart ladies are the bomb I flex for ingenues For babes in their 80s ‘Cause I’ve devoted my life To flexing for the ladies BRIDGE Here I am Here I am Look at me Look at me Watch me pump Watch me strut Look at me Look at me CHORUS 3 I’m flexing for the public I’m flexing for the fans If you’d like to come and watch me I don’t have other plans I’ll flex for you right now So don’t call me a tease ‘Cause I’ve devoted my life To flexing for the ladies CHORUS 4 I’m flexing for the ladies I’m flexing for the men I’m flexing for myself I thing I’m gonna flex again There’s no need to act bored You can touch if you say please ‘Cause I’ve devoted my life To flexing for the ladies
3.
VERSE 1   Those bell-bottom pants  Vibrate on your hips I know you’re checking out my mallet From the way you lick your lips   I can pound my own drum Beat my skins, ring my gong But the groove is so much better When we’re both thumping along   PRE-CHORUS    I’m gonna bang you  Bang you Bang you   CHORUS     I'm gonna bang you like a cowbell Set the tempo with my stick Pounding out the downbeat Coming loud and quick   VERSE 2   You know that I can play I’m rhythmically endowed The rock is like thunder You scream even more loud   There’s a ringing in our ears  We both know what that’s about  When the banging begins   You got to let your metal out   PRE-CHORUS    CHORUS     BRIDGE     That’s it baby You’re bagin’ just right Let’s do it baby We can keep bangin’ all night    CHORUS  x2
4.
I’m a loner (x4) Standing on my own Rock is my life (x4) Metal is my home And I need to get a kitten I need to get a kitten Kittens are metal as fuck I need to get a kitten Little kitten (x4) I’m so glad you’re mine So small and cute I’ll love you for all time
5.
INTRO Let me tell you ‘bout a story 'bout some kids I knew back in 1989 The internet was just a baby then, you couldn't just go online And so you couldn't just click if you wanted a pic of a woman all undressed You had to work hard, and you had to have luck, if you wanted to be so blessed VERSE 1 Tommy's walkin' through the woods on a bright Sunday morning where the party was the night before He’d been at home playing video games, no girls knocking at his door The cool kids don't even know his name, his parents won't let him go anyway But now when mom and dad send him to church, this is where he comes to pray He thinks half-drunk beers could be his sacred wine, but he spits out his very first sip He would try to find God in a castaway roach but he's afraid to touch the clip But then the wind blows and flips the page of an abandoned magazine And laid out before him is the most perfect sight his eyes have ever seen CHORUS 1 Dirty Magazines In the woods And now he's gettin' a peek At more than he should He wants his first kiss so bad But he's a little too good So he's reading all about it in Magazines in the woods VERSE 2 That same morning found Heather asleep curled up underneath a tree She'd been a little wild at the party last night with beer plentiful and free She blinked her eyes and held her head and thought maybe she'd just die With mom drugged out and dad long gone no one would ever cry When she heard the moan she thought at first that someone had been hurt She followed the sound when at last she found Tommy wearing just his shirt She thought with that big brain of his he could help her leave this town And with that giant heart he had she might just keep him around CHORUS 2 Dirty Magazines In the woods And now she's gettin' a peek At more than she should She knows she's being so bad But she thinks he looks good While he's staring at pictures in Magazines in the woods BRIDGE / SOLO VERSE 3 Well things were a little awkward at first when Heather said hello But they got to talking and soon it felt like they were friends from long ago And Monday at school kids stared at them and couldn't understand How it came to be that Heather and Tommy were walking hand in hand Two lonely souls knew love that day and they're still together now They've got three kids and travel the world as their busy jobs allow They think about days spent outside before computer screens They proudly publish one of the world's last dirty magazines CHORUS 1 Dirty Magazines In the woods And now he's gettin' a peek At more than he should He wants his first kiss so bad But he's a little too good So he's reading all about it in Magazines in the woods CHORUS 3 Dirty Magazines In the woods And now she's gettin' a peek At more than she should She knows she's being so bad But she thinks he looks good When they are staring at pictures in Magazines in the woods

about

The debut EP by Owen's New Best Friends, Dirty Magazines is a collection of "hair metal"-inspired rockers and ballads.

credits

released January 28, 2019

Odilon Green: Music & Lyrics (twitter.com/OdilonGreen)
Jay Mayo: Vocals (twitter.com/JayMayo_)

Album art by: Jesus Garcia (www.deviantart.com/raro666)

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Owen's New Best Friends

Owen's New Best Friends are:

Odilon Green (music & lyrics)

Jay Mayo (vocals).

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